THE MIGHTY YAMPA ISN'T YOUR FRIEND

Who We Are

The Yampa is MIGHTY. It doesn't need any so called "friends" to coddle it. It needs worthy enemies to conquer and overcome. WE ARE THOSE ENEMIES.

Meetings

Our meetings are always held on dry land in full view of the Mighty Yampa so it can't sneak up on us.

Donations

All donations go directly to the founder of this site - a shadowy figure of ill repute who exclusively uses the proceeds to buy damn building supplies...and beer.

How Can You Help?

You can't.


We're likely also your enemy.

Why Are You Doing This?

After reading one too many dumb post on the Steamboat Rant & Rave Facebook group, we had an epiphany.
Enjoying the Mighty Yampa isn't good enough. You need to show it RESPECT. That respect can only be shown through honorable combat with the river.

This Is Sweet, How Do I Join?

First, you need to prove that you've never stand up paddle boarded. That's way too lame for us.

Second, you'll need to prove your worthiness - Conan the Barbarian style - by drinking the blood of your enemy. In this case, that means chugging a full Nalgene of the Mighty Yampa in one go.

If you're not ready yet, you can always subscribe to our awesome newsletter to see all the stuff you're missing out on.

Upcoming Events!

Monthly Support Group

Has flooding or low flow ruined your life? You're not alone.

Weekly Paddle Boarder Scare

The Might Yampa has no use for weaklings on paddle boards. Every week we get together and hide in the bushes near the Steamboat Botanical Garden to jump out and scare some.

Winter Mocking Sesh

Every January when the Mighty Yampa freezes over we get together on it's shore and shout insults at it because it's too weak to flow properly.

How Mighty is the Yampa?

Bro.

Do you not even know that the Mighty Yampa is Colorado's last free flowing river??

Don't let lame low-flow years trick you, the Yampa is incredibly Mighty and getting Mightyerer all the time. Check out the sweet graph our advanced computer model generated.

This is one of the many reasons we've dedicated our lives to fighting it before it becomes too strong.

Can I get in touch?

You can try. You won't succeed.

If you absolute need to, you can email us at victory@ this website.com


COMING SOON: MERCH!

We're working with some of the worst and cheapest designers in the biz to bring you swag!!! Check back soon to see our barely acceptable collection of:

SURVEY MADNESS!!!

Take the survey!